Hell’s Grannies

This morning I was hit from behind by a very nice old lady on what I have since discovered is called a Mobility Scooter. I was maintaining my usual brisk walking pace when said old lady misjudged her passing manoeuvre, which means she was going pretty quick and on a reasonably crowded pavement. She was mortified and she apologised profusely in that heartfelt way people in their seventies do. But as she whizzed off I realised I am beginning to see more and more of these scooters. And guess what? I have since discovered they can do 8mph and sometimes more (you can get them tuned apparently). They currently need no license and (amazingly) no insurance so if my dear assailant had crippled me there would be no easy payment for me to buy my own. And no congestion charge . . . . hmmmm….so it takes me about 40 minutes door to door to get to work by tube, which is just under six miles away . . . . so why not join them and commute in on the damn things? I have since discovered that they come in many types with exciting names like Monza. And I suspect that, whilst they are vital pieces of kit for many otherwise home-bound people, they are also used by the ‘lazy-aged’ and ‘thrill-seeking wrinklies’ set too. What is the nation coming too?

[tags] Mobility Scooters, Grannies [/tags]

Wonder if you can get them pimped?

David Brain


  1. When my Mum first got MND she had one of those and as she was always a fast driver she used the same technique to zoom around. Her complaint was always that it didn’t go fast enough and the horn wasn’t loud enough so people didn’t move out of her way in time!

  2. My grandpa owns two of them. First he got one that did 4mph. To slow for my grandma who rides beside him by bike. So they bought another one that does over 9mph. But don’t be afraid. He lives in the country.

  3. Oh they can be very dangerous. I have one independant living facility in Massachuccets where it was getting so bad with the residents running other seniors over, that they are now not allowed to use them until they have been through therapy driving school. We issue them with side mirrors and fix the speed so they cannot go above 5mph. I know from frequent expreience that they can hurt when you are “run over” by one of them.

  4. “….so why not join them and commute
    in on the damn things?”

    umm…but wot would you do with it
    when you get there???

    Park in car space?…
    Take it into your office?…

  5. C. Hill. These things are so below the official radar on insuarnce, tax and congestion charge, i bet i could just park anywhere and they would not even get a ticket or a clamp….noone’s going to ticket or clamp something they thing a dear old lady has just got off. They are the perfect commuter vehicles I tell you.

  6. David B…I beg to differ.

    Many have been ripped off in my senior apt. complex (San Diego). I prefer speed, distance, I get w/ my little gas driven 2-wheel (50cc) Vino. Soon will have to go to an electric 3-wheeler–advantages being parking in apt., driving it into stores, a trade-off. I wouldn’t consider ‘parking’ one anywhere, tho.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *